Anatomy of a 2ww

November 6, 2008 at 9:33 pm (Uncategorized)

Day of Ovulation/IUI: “Wheeeee! Hope! Possibility! Have my hips been elevated long enough?”

1-2 dpo/dpiui: “Wonder if anything’s going on in there. Wonder if this will be the cycle. Not that I’m thinking about it. It’s waaaaay too early to think about it.”

3-5 dpo/dpiui: “I’m thinking about it. I’m googling things, like what the success rates are for my very precise situation. But it’s waaaaaay too early to feel anything.”

6-8 dpo/dpiui: “It’s officially not too early to feel anything. Which means now I have to think about it. Did I just feel something? Excuse me, I must go and google this.”

9-10 dpo/dpiui: “My boobs are definitely getting more sore. Then again, I have been punching them repeatedly for the last two hours.”

11 dpo/dpiui: “FUUUUUUCK. I feel like I always do, and my boobs don’t even hurt when I punch them anymore. I’m not nauseous. I can’t even dream myself into feeling queasy. Time to google “11 dpo no symptoms” for the 15th time today.”

12-13 dpo/dpiui: “I know that I could probably pee on a stick right now and have this over with, but I am not ready to give up this dream yet. I’d rather live in ignorance. And besides, maybe I’d get a false negative and get depressed for no reason. Still, it just doesn’t seem possible that this could have worked. Now that I’m here, and I’m still me, and the me I know is never, ever pregnant, how could I possibly be right now?”

14 dpo/dpiui: (thus far) “Yeah. Just what I thought. I truly am not surprised at all. And I hate that I’m not surprised. With this attitude, how will I ever succeed?”

AAAAAAAAAHHHH how I want this time to be different.

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2 Comments

  1. Mel said,

    Hahaha… this is so true.
    What sucks the most is the cycle I got pregnant was the one where I had no symptoms at all. I swear I had more “pregnancy symptoms” on my failed cycles. I totally psyched myself out, what a loser I was.
    *hugs*

  2. Angie said,

    Hi Tam,
    Sorry for the lack of commenting lately but for some reason I have been having trouble accessing word press journals at work (which is where I usually blog – bad me!). Anyway, I am checking in from home right now. I couldn’t agree more about your 2ww analysis. Righ now I am at 12dpiui and fit right into the stage you mentioned. Depressing. At any rate, things sound great for you this cycle and I have all the hope in the world for you. I’ll be thinking of you and will check in again as soon as I can. Hang in there, hon.

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